[Replay] Learning How To Argue

Jason and I decided to talk about us and how we deal with getting through disagreements, how we have gotten through disagreements and continuing to work on getting through disagreement..

That’s right, because there is no for sure way and there is no foolproof way and we are still learning and doing.  What we learned is that every situation calls for a different approach.

This means everybody’s relationship is going to be different. These are some of the things that we’ve worked throughout our 30 years of marriage.

I think we approach problems with only thinking about our view. It’s about how you believe what you’re saying is the truth, what you believe. You believe that you have a valid issue and this is your issue with whatever it is, and you want this to be the answer to it.

Understand the real problem

That’s not really the problem or the issue, and this is the problem and this is kind of how we should handle it going forward.  the problem is that we are on different sides of the fence and we don’t want to come around to the other side. It’s not because we don’t agree with the other person.

I think once we get so far in and we’re arguing our point that we can’t give in. It’s like we have to stand our ground. I think that’s the problem with most relationships. You don’t want to give up your point and you don’t want to give up your point,

You have a disagreement and the other person knows what they want to do, and so therefore they’re tired of arguing their point, whether it’s buying a dishwasher, buying a new car, going on a vacation, whatever the problem is, the other person has voiced their opinion, I want to do this.

Your point of view

I think we should do that. And the other person is dead set against it. the other person initially doesn’t want to do it, so therefore they feel as though they have to stick to their guns to defend what their initial thing was. Instead of saying, Hey, let me look at this from their perspective, or why am I so against it, and let me see if I can actually come up with the reason that we both can agree on.

It’s hard to compromise when you’re trying to hold on to your point. When you’re trying to stay strong in your own, your position. And sometimes you may initially really feel a certain way about something , this is my point and I’m gonna stick to it. instead of actually thinking about why am I against it , what is the problem?

Conflict is healthy

Learn to see things from the other person’s point of view. This is no easy task, but agree that you are both are right and move on. Conflict and arguing is healthy for a relationship as long as it doesn’t get out of hand. Embrace your differences to build a stronger bound between the to of you

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